INTERVEIW WITH REB HESHY
Tell us about Aishel
Q: WHAT IS AISHEL?
A: Aishel is an organization composed of a group of local Mechanchim and community Askonim who recognize that good kids coming from fine homes can sometimes face difficult choices. Aishel has successfully helped many teens in our community over the past 21 years.
We also proactively address the challenges that can potentially put young people at risk.
Q: WHAT IS AISHEL’S OBJECTIVE?
A: Aishel’s objective is quite simple: PREVENTION.
In today’s environment, teens sometimes face difficult choices. Some obvious and others treacherously deceptive. Our goal is to intervene before little challenges become big problems – before a teen gets "too close to the edge".
Q: WHAT SERVICES DOES AISHEL OFFER?
A: Aishel provides services that meet the needs of teenagers from Toronto’s (GTA) Orthodox Jewish community who are exhibiting signs of going off the derech, and other such inner challenges.
One of Aishel’s core services is our “Drop-in Center”. The CENTER provides a warm and safe environment for the teens to express themselves without fear of judgment and without shame. The Center also enables the teens to relax over a game of Pool or just for some warm food and a caring word.
Our programs include (but are not limited to) parent mentoring, school placement assistance, referrals to mental health professionals and career counseling.
Q: IF YOU COULD OFFER ONLY ONE PIECE OF PRACTICAL ADVICE FOR PARENTS OF TEENS AND PRE-TEENS, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
A: Have an open relationship with your child. This is probably the most important step you can take. You want to create an atmosphere in which your child is comfortable sharing his thoughts and issues with you. Then, as problems surface, you will have an open line of communication.
Q: HOW DO YOU ESTABLISH AN OPEN RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR CHILD, PARTICULARLY IN THE EARLY YEARS?
A: There are many contributing factors to a trusting and open relationship -- the atmosphere at home, your interactions with your spouse and children, and of course, love. Remember, loving intentions are not enough. Parents should try to communicate in a way that acknowledges what the child is experiencing. Don't minimize your child's challenges; instead, try to make them feel understood by giving them a true listening ear.
Q: AND WHEN THINGS START TO GET OUT OF CONTROL WITH MY TEEN...?
A: Aishel is here for you when the need arises. In the most discreet manner we will do our best to help out.
Q: HOW SHOULD I REACT IF MY TEENAGER BEGINS TO SHOW THAT KEEPING MITZVOS IS BURDENSOME?
A: Unfortunately, you can only isolate so far. The outside world is not only incredibly attractive, but also more accessible than ever. Try to find an opportunity to talk about it. Children will share a lot, when encouraged to talk.
Discuss your values and the way Hashem wants us to view life.
Q: ANY FINAL THOUGHTS TO SHARE?
A: Raising children, with all its inherent blessings and burdens, can be confusing and perplexing.
Being a parent takes almost superhuman strength today. Being a parent in a frum household almost requires divine intervention. We can only hope and pray that the Ribono Shel Olam looks favourably on our youth.
Q:HOW DOES ONE REACH OUT TO AISHEL FOR HELP?
A: Choose the option that you're most comfortable with. You can call (416) 828-0987, email rebheshy@aishel.ca or contact us through our web site aishel.ca/contact. Keep in mind, all communication will remain confidential.